Why I Love My Mother

• Politician at door: (blah blah blah)...and my strong commitment to traditional family values, as my wife of 28 years will attest.
• Shade's mom: Sir, I don't care if you have orgies every Tuesday night so long as you get your job done.
• Politician: ...
• Shade's mom: Also, if "traditional family values" is a sneaky way of saying "anti-gay marriage stance," you should know that my daughter is bisexual, and if I never get to cry at her wedding because some law you passed made her wedding illegal, I will personally see that your wife of 28 years has a lesbian awakening in time for you to discover the virtues of traditional divorce.
• Politician: ...you have yourself a nice day, m'am.

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